Whence Congress enacted and President Obama signed the NOEL law (Naughtiness Obliteration and Elimination Law of 2012):
…(1) Imposes a naughtiness “fee” of $50 upon each American child for every documented instance of their “naughtiness.” Revenues from this “fee” are to support the Federal Nice Fund (FNF), a newly created fund for public-works projects in NOEL-compliant states. (NOEL, § 3(a).)…
(4) To ensure full compliance, the NOEL bars any “person, group, or agency” that receives “funding, or any benefit from the federal government” from making a “material naughtiness determination” contrary to rules promulgated by the NRB, with the consequence of such a contrary determination being withdrawal of the federal funding and/or other benefit. (Id., § 22(z)(12)(F)(vii)(¥)(‰) (LOL)(¿)(?)(D).)…
Relax. It’s not real (yet). It’s just Prof. Kyle Graham’s constitutional law exam holiday card.
Kevin from Lowering the Bar has a new book out on odd laws (more on how to buy it).
“South Dakota v. Fifteen Impounded Cats” is one of those fairly common in rem cases with an amusing caption. Would you really be surprised if the cats won? [Lowering the Bar, which has the best list I've seen of comical case names]
P.S. On a more serious note, many of these cases are attempted forfeitures with the associated due process problems [The Economist]
Shady lawyer character Saul Goodman, played by actor Bob Odenkirk, was so popular with viewers that he’s getting his own prequel [Deadline.com, Guardian, L.A. Times, BuzzFeed] AMC’s joke website is worth a click, but be warned that it auto-plays an audio (which touts, among other things, a two-for-one misdemeanor shoplifting defense).
“Bob Odenkirk, who portrays Breaking Bad’s resident shyster Saul Goodman with gleeful shamelessness…. [sits] down with Vulture’s own Julie Klausner to get his thoughts on some of the country’s best so-bad-they’re-good lawyer ads.” [Vulture]
It seems I’m Justice Stephen Breyer. [humor, Kyle Graham]
In the South, a wedding engagement gone sadly wrong leads to a compulsively readable opinion by Judge William Pryor for an Eleventh Circuit panel, complete with reference to the TV show The Dukes of Hazzard. [Myers v. Bowman, PDF; summary judgment affirmed against civil rights claim](bad link fixed now)
Given the bossiness of the legislature in Annapolis these days, I had to check the calendar on this one. [Anita Park, Greater Greater Washington, April 1]
P.S. And from The Onion, where every day is April 1: “Mississippi Bans Soft Drinks Smaller Than 20 Ounces.”
Yet more: Didn’t Ilya Shapiro predict this? “Supreme Court upholds same-sex marriage as a tax” [Tax Foundation]
Instead of litigation or other varieties of dispute resolution that might leave hard feelings, why not try arm wrestling, a coin flip, drawing straws, or rock-paper-scissors? [Cracked] Earlier here.
“This is known as the ‘Canadian girlfriend’ school of legal argumentation.” [Popehat, on the unwillingness of the British government to cite specific legal authority backing up its threats against NearlyFreeSpeech.net, a U.S.-based website]
…had a great career in litigation after his fall [Pearls Before Swine cartoon, Sept. 23]
Satire by Kyle Graham about some high-level legal-literary feuding.
Among them, The Randy Barnett: “Activity tonight, inactivity tomorrow!” [Tristyn Bloom]
A well-worn figure of speech among legal advocates is a literal tradition in some New England coastal communities, especially on Boston’s North Shore. [Ben Zimmer, Boston Globe]