Who those wacky warnings are for

On May 2, Bill Childs’ blog covered the litigation over Wolfgang Puck self-heating latte cans, a bad business idea gone worse when the cans never quite worked right. A June 17 commenter, however, perhaps demonstrates why some people need lessons in natural selection rather than attorneys (all misspellings in original, emphasis added):

When will there be a class action suit against WP Gourmet Lattes? In this microwave society and Campbell Soup’s TV ads on microwavable soup in a can, WP’s self-heating can was negligent in it’s small, hidden warning against heating in a microwave (which causes a severe explosion in a matter of seconds). Our microwave was destroyed, our kitchen covered in dried latte and most important, my wife required 7 stiches above her eye.

Some skepticism is warranted; on the Internet, noone knows if you’re a dog, or an especially subtle prankster. I almost hate to publicize this: there’s some chance it’s fake, and if it’s real, it’s likely that this post will help Mr. Edwards find a lawyer who thinks Wolfgang Puck should be held liable when people put a self-heating can in the microwave because its warnings against it weren’t sufficiently idiot-proof.

Update: video store owner off hook

Following up on our May 2 account: the Arlington County, Va., Human Rights Commission has reversed itself and dismissed a complaint against the conservative Christian owner of a video store who declined to duplicate a customer’s gay-rights videos (“This week in Arlington”, Arlington Connection, Jun. 14; Elizabeth A. Perry, “Fight over Arlington gay video not over yet”, Washington Blade, Jun. 16).

Deep pocket files: 1st Security Self-Storage

In June 2004, a jury found Edward James Egan guilty of raping a 15-year old girl. Egan had asked the victim to mop out a storage shed and raped her in an apartment; she also had a sexual encounter with him in an empty storage unit. This was, according to the follow-up lawsuit filed a month later, the fault of 1st Security Self-Storage, which employed Egan. Egan passed a background check, including references from previous employers, but the defendant paid a $150,000 settlement. The article quotes me, as I note the hidden costs of penalizing employers for their employees’ crimes committed outside the scope of their employment. (Mike Allen, “Self-storage company agrees to pay $150,000 settlement”, Roanoke Times, Jun. 7).

Scary Banzhaf

Our least favorite member of the George Washington University faculty is seeking to lay out the legal backing for a proposal being floated by Arkansas Gov. Huckabee to ban smoking by women who are pregnant. Huckabee recently signed a bill to ban smoking in cars when children are present. (Sullum, Reason “Hit and Run”, Jun. 15). More on tobacco and tyranny here.

AG candidates and their lawsuits: Dustin McDaniel

First in a series.

In 1998, two boys, Mitchell Johnson and Andrew Golden, stole guns from a locked cabinet and engaged in a school shooting at Westside Middle School in Jonesboro, Arkansas, that killed five people. The boys were eventually convicted of capital murder. 2006 Democratic nominee for Attorney General Dustin McDaniel, representing the families of the victims, sued the gun manufacturers. (Kenneth Heard, “Public defenders agency to pay for Jonesboro shooters civil case”, Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, July 27, 1999). A judge threw out the suit, but the defendants had to spend money to defend themselves, part of a trial attorney campaign against gun manufacturers. (Kenneth Heard, “Gun maker, grandfather dropped from school shooting suit”, Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, May 10, 2000). The suit was further controversial because a judge ordered taxpayers to pick up the cost of defending the civil lawsuit against the two shooters.

(Know of other trial lawyers, Republican or Democrat, with appalling suits running for office this November? E-mail me.)

Suing Streisand for not staying retired?

According to the New York Daily News’ columnists Rush & Molloy (Jun. 13): “Barbra Streisand’s emergence from ‘retirement’ has set off a buzz among longtime Streisand fans, who say they paid exorbitant amounts of money for her last ‘retirement’ tour and may file a class-action suit against the legend for tricking them into thinking they were seeing her for the final time.”

For those who find this idea utterly far-fetched, it should be noted that quite a number of years ago an unsuccessful class-action suit was pursued against General Motors following its reintroduction of convertible Cadillac models; a few years earlier, some enthusiasts had purchased some other convertible Caddies following press buzz about how they were going to be the last convertibles built in America.

“Jurors award $2 million in child’s mower death”

Lawyers successfully urge a Virginia jury to send a message:

Justin Simmons was killed in April 2004 in Daleville, north of Roanoke, when a mower operated at his daycare center rolled backward while going up a slope and over the child….

The jury held MTD responsible for not designing a mower that automatically stops its blades whenever it rolls backward. No such mower exists or has ever been tested, [company attorney John] Fitzpatrick said.

The company also argued that the operator of the mower, whose wife was the daycare provider, had ignored safety warnings. (“Jurors award $2 million in child’s mower death– company to appeal”, AP/Richmond Times-Dispatch, Jun. 15).

More: Considerable further detail is to be found in Mike Allen’s coverage for the Roanoke Times: “Lawyers for lawn mower maker, operator lay blame in boy’s death”, Jun. 8, and “Lawn mower company liable in boy’s death”, Jun. 15.

More: Aug. 18.

The Bloomsday litigants

The grandson of James Joyce, Stephen James Joyce, has used his control of the copyrights to Joyce’s work to impede scholarly research by threatening to withhold consent to any academic who would veer into investigation of the family history. He spent a hundred thousand dollars of the estate’s money to halt publication of a new edition of “Ulysses”; has “blocked or discouraged” a number of readings; and threatened to sue the National Library of Ireland when it sought to display its copies of Joyce’s manuscripts. In revenge for Michael Groden’s favorable blurb of a scholar Stephen Joyce disliked, Joyce quoted a price of a million and a half dollars for Groden’s right to quote “Ulysses” in the multimedia work he spent seven years preparing. D.T. Max in the June 19 New Yorker explores the younger Joyce’s battles, and also mentions other litigious literary estates.

Read On…